Heartbroken and Helpless

You feel heartbroken when your husband tells you he feels like he did before being diagnosed with cancer, run down and tired all the time with a fever and chills. You feel helpless because this whole weekend he has not had the energy to do anything and there is nothing you can do about it.

Last night, as we are laying in bed with our arms wrapped around each other, he apologizes for not spending any time with us. My heart just sank because I could hear the scaredness in his voice and I said, don’t be sorry for anything. Your body needs time to adjust to the new meds and now that you are on immunotherapy, its different. You body is fighting is fighting the cancer cells. Think of it as having the flu. We have keep hope that this treatment is working because of how you are feeling, even though I wish there was something I could do to help you feel better.

We then squeezed each other a little tighter and I fell asleep.

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